So there's this guy I've been on and off with for the last 4yrs. I met him at a club on valentines day, and let me tell u it felt like love at first sight. He introduced himself and we exchanged numbers. Within the next few days we had exchanged a few texts and made plans for him to come over with a few of his friends to hang out. I don't know how many of u have felt like this but there are certain people whom just grasp your heart and your emotions and u have no idea why, well he was one of them. I couldn't put my finger on it but I always tell him " I'm addicted to your light" I wasn't completely sure where it came from nor why I felt so drawn to him but I guess these are one of the few things that u will never be able to explain. In the months and years to come we remained close, but the thing about him was he was terrible at keeping promises, he would promise to call, to text or to meet somewhere and just wouldn't, this chase drove me insane, much like the guy in my post "lying cheating son of a gun" I'm obsessed with control and when I don't have it I tend to go a little nutty. Every time I would go out and run into him my heart would drop I truly believe at one point I was in love with him, he was and is the type of guy that makes me 2nd think my actions and want to be a better woman, not just for him but for myself. As the weeks days months and years go on our relationship stays the same, never progressing. I would see him once a month, once every 2weeks and sometimes not even we could go for weeks or months without speaking but every time I spent time with him all the feelings would rush back. Now the problem with us was in the in betweens I was obviously out and on the scene I still dated guys and had random hook ups which a few happened to be his acquaintances. He's a very protective and private person, whom Is extremely religious and I forgot to mention we'd never slept together, even to this day. Me being with people he knew and was around him didn't sit well and inevitably made him not want to be in a committed relationship with me.
-Ok, now I see his point, but he had a chance MANY chances to have me before I met his friends and if he would have spoke up about the fact that he disliked me being out often, I could have and would have calmed my ways for him, no one is a mind reader and him not taking initioative made me think he didn't want to be with me so I'm going to continue to be whom I chose and make my own decisions as a grown indepentant woman.
He's a well known actor and when he went over seas to film a movie we talked everyday he was away, sent picture, emails and chatted on bbm, I even went to visit him while he was on set and let me again state WE NEVER had sex, our relationship was purley emotional which is even more intense. When he came back we had made promises to see eachother the night he arrived back into LA and made plans to finally do the deed. He didn't show until 3days after he had arrived back in the states. I made everything perfect, an itunes playlist, candels, dinner and exspensive lingire. He came over we ate, drank and talked then we finally moved things into my room just when things started getting hot and heavy he jumped up and said he needed to run to the car to get a condom. He never came back, never picked up my calls and disappeared for a month.
When he finally got in touch with me through email he told me his car had gotten broken into, blah blah blah bullshit bullshit bullshit. I didn't speak to him for about 2months after that and got into a relationship with someone else. Throughout my relationship with the other person we still spoke, I know, bad bad bad dunnie but even though I was with someone else, he still had my heart.
The person I was dating was an aquatance of his, whom I had met one night when I had gone to meet him at a resteraunt (bad idea like I said before DONT DATE within the circle) I had told my current boyfriend about my relationship with him and the heartbreak and love I "had had for him" even though it was still there. Once my boyfriend and I broke up, a bitter breakup may I add, they ran into eachother. They both exchanges stories about me and my ex went on and on about how I still spoke to him during our relationship and how bad that had hurt him. Being a man and not wanting to feel as though he had taken another mans women he said some pretty awful things about me, that I was a "jump off" and he "had no respect for me" blah blah blah but the thing was we were hardly physical which is what hurt the most. It was about 6months this time before I spoke to him again.
As the years have gone on and I have grown as a person I realized I was stuck in a situation with no progression, I was giving a lot of myself emotionally with someone who had no intent to ever be with me and my heart slowly began to change, I stopped picking up calls, running when he would invite me over and wouldn't return texts. He started to realize and then the tables turned, but it was too late, my heart had changed. I still to this day love him, but its not the same kind of butterfly excited love, its a caring kind of love, like I care for him as a person and his well being. I recently asked him " why I was never his girlfriend" and he answered me with
" You're a littl bit to in the scene for me. Seen with. Been with. Hooked up. Made out with...etc. I'm very protective. And private....to walk through a club, or a pop spot and have dudes look and be able to identify in some sort of way with my girl is a No No for me."
I respected that it was an honest answer and it makes complete sense but why did u waste 4yrs of my time to enevitibly end up on the conclusion you could of had in the beginning.
So ladies here is my advice to you, if a man wants to be with u he will, he will tell you he will open up about the things he loves about you and the things he doesn't, don't waste your time in a relationship that is strictly on him, on his terms and something that has no progression, if you've been seeing someone whom you seem to have a connection with and who seems to like you and its been 3-4months and he hasn't made it official or you haven't progressed turn it into a friendship because its not going to go anywhere. If he's into you he's going to want to lock you down as his girl before someone else does don't wait around til he's ready letting him watch you "do things he doesn't like" and then usuing them against you when u ask about becoming a couple, hey if he would have committed then u probably wouldn't live your life like you were single and if he's not claiming you then why the hell would you live your life like he was your man, trust me if you do that he's getting the milk without buying the cow. He has his cake and can eat it too, a girl who acts as his girlfriend but he is free from all the consiquenses and obligations that come with being in a relationship. No matter how much he says he doesn't want to be in a relationship or he "doesn't do relationships" he's saying I don't want one with you cause I promise once he finds a girl he likes he'll be in a relationship and you'll be heartbroken. Don't allow that, trust me I've been through it and I did see him have a girlfriend at one point. If he doesn't make you his girl then you're wasting your time. Move on to someone who loves u for you regardless of your flaws or actions, trust me, he's out there.
Happy hunting.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
1st date blues
We all either LOVE or HATE 1st dates, personally I love them, maybe its because I'm full of myself and have a lot to say and I love sharing myself to others and making new friends or maybe its because I like to get dressed to go to places besides the club.
When I head out on a 1st date I always throw together an outfit that shows my personal style and flair, don't dress how you think he wants you to or what u think he'd like, be you from the 1st moment the 1st date, of course you want to impress him so you may spend a little more time on your hair or makeup that's understandable but
"don't be a wolf in sheep clothing"
Make sure you do however dress appropriately for the restaurant, I wouldn't want you showing up in flats and a hat to Mr. Chow, not that you couldn't but take the opportunity to go to a lovely fancy restaurant and wear your fabulous dress u wouldn't necessarily wear to the club.
As you prepare for your date, and once you've decided on a time and a place jump online and look over the menu before you head out. This little trick helps A LOT! Not only can you make sure you're pronouncing your order correctly but it cuts down on the awkward silence while you're both trying to look at the menu, also if the date is going well from the beginning neither of u want to spend 25mins of not really looking at the menu because you both are still in conversation and neither of u can focus on the dishes, you know how that is, the waitress will come by 3 or 4times to ask if you're ready and you'll both say "oh geeze I wasn't even looking" this trick has helped me the most at sushi restaurants, coming from Pittsburgh we don't have many, I don't think we really have any to be honest so I would always get awkward not knowing what I was ordering, this will also get u familiar with the different dishes bc if u plan on staying/living or visiting LA for any length of time you'll want to be on point when it comes to your sushi game.
Now, if he asks you to pick the restaurant or if he asks u for a suggestion here are some awesome places, I've based them on where you may have met him and grouped accordingly, I also added in addresses, attire suggestions and my favorite dishes at each place!
Enjoy!!
So you're going on a date with a total hipster u met at a dark dive bar downtown, or at a Hollywood bar on Cahuenga Blvd he asks you to dinner and knowing he likes it low key, judging on where you met him you can suggest these places.
Here are some amazing 1st date places for dinner with your hipster in Hollywood.
Birds
5925 Franklin Avenue
Los Angeles, CA 90068
(323) 465-0175
Vibe: laid back bar/restaurant a place u can order a beer but still feel like a lady.
Attire: this is when u throw on those tight Frankie B skinny legs or thick black leggings, a pair of ankle boots a beanie or something cute in your hair and some funky layered jewelry
Check out http://www.shopmisskara.com/ for some awesome layering pieces.
If its warm out throw on a skirt or a cute pair of high waisted jean shorts with an open toe wedge and a plain tank along with some jewelry
My fav dish: 1/2 chicken marinated rotisserie chicken with 2 sides and choice or dipping sauce, it also come with pita bread and I always order a beer with it.
Toi Thai
505 1/2 W Sunset Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90046-3407
(323) 874-8062
One of my ALL time favorite places I LA
Attire- total rocker, this is when u break out the vintage tee the jean shorts, ripped jeans the ripped tights or knee highs I showed u how to wear in my post "Knee hi's" you can definitely wear those flat rocker boots you're afraid to wear to the club. Step out in a funky hair style and a dark lipstick, just ROCK out!
Vibe:The food is just as good as the vibe, they play amazing classic rock music just a touch too loud and u usually don't have to wait, if there is a little wait you can walk next door to the a joining art gallery that's filled with really cool paintings of your favorite rock stars to spark a convo and feel out what kind of music he's into and what kind of person he is by which paintings he's drawn to. Music is the best way to break the ice this restaurant is low key with dime lights and paintings and posters all over the walls, I LOVE LOVE LOVE
Side note: Although it looks like a good idea when u come in and see the table were u can sit on the floor and eat, I don't suggest picking this because your feet will fall asleep from sitting on them and it could be awkward positioning depending on that you're wearing, def not good seating if you're in a dress or skirt
My fav dish: the lemon chicken dish with a side of fried rice, the curry is to die for as well. Order some sake and a Sapporo and take some sake bombs, this is the perfect place to laugh, have fun and sing along to the background music.
Bossa Nova
7181 Sunset Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90046
(323) 436-7999
Vibe: super super casual, a brazilian resteraunt that has EVERYTHING from pizza to sandwhiches to pastas, indoor and outdoor seating.
Attire: Definitly a jeans and sweater or shorts and tshirt kind of place. Don't get too dolled up dress as if you were going to the movies or the mall but add an extra flair due to the fact it is a dinner.
My fav dish: the bread they give u is sooo yummy and the chucho chicken club sandwich or the chuchos salad are both great, the chicken alfredo pasta is delish and order a glass of white wine, I like the St. Michelle.
Barney's Beanery
8447 Santa Monica Boulevard,
West Hollywood
(323) 654-2287
This place is cool because it has some history as well, it was the final destination for westbound travelers on route 66.
Vibe: This is a total bar vibe, pool tables and beer with bar food
Attire: You can wear pretty much anything I had mentioned in the previous places, I would suggest wearing flats though because it is more of a bar environment than a restaurant.
Fav dish: I'm totally obsessed with french fries and they have THE best here so I order any sort of sandwich with fries as my side and a Jack Daniels and coke.
Ok so you meet a guy at a posh club, he is dressed well, pretty stylish but not a hipster, he wants to grab sushi somewhere nice in Hollywood I suggest these place and I also suggest making a reservation.
Katsuya
6300 Hollywood Boulevard
Los Angeles
(323) 871-8777
Koi
730 N La Cienega Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90069
(310) 659-9449
Katana
8439 West Sunset Boulevard
West Hollywood, CA 90069
(323) 650-8585
Nobu
903 North La Cienega Boulevard
West Hollywood, CA 90069-4709
(310) 657-5711
Now these are the places you break out the nice dresses and your expensive shoes, they are all the empitimy of "Hollywood" I promise on any given evening you will run into someone famous, going to these restaurants is your time to show off and shine. I suggest a classy little black dress with your added flair of style, a simple hair do and minimal make-up, carry a small clutch bag and bring out your best shoe.
Look over the menu before hand, make sure you know what each dish is, the good thing is if this guy is taking you to one of these places he usually does the ordering and you'll share. If not lucky for you, youll be prepared.
If hes looking for a nice steak house, here are my suggetions, same attire applies:
Stk
Boa
Cut
Mastros
Madeao
Fancy asian spots
Mr chow
Benihana
Gyro kaku
My personal favorite place to eat in all of LA is... drum roll please...
Dantana's!
9071 Santa Monica Boulevard
West Hollywood, CA 90069
(310) 275-9444
its the cutest homiest little gem in my opinion in Los Angeles I absolutly adore this spot and the staff. You almost get the feeling you having dinner at your cool Italian grandparents house and the food is to DIE for I cant even pick one thing on the menu because its all amazing, but theyre known for thier chicken parm. I give this place 5stars!
and finally a few of my favorite spots for lunch!
Primo
Ill tramazino
La scala
The farm
Fred siegal cafe
Tomato pie
Lalas
Sorry I got a little lazy at the end here and didnt add in addys and phone numbers but just throw them in your google search and you'll be able to find them. Happy dating and happy eating :)
When I head out on a 1st date I always throw together an outfit that shows my personal style and flair, don't dress how you think he wants you to or what u think he'd like, be you from the 1st moment the 1st date, of course you want to impress him so you may spend a little more time on your hair or makeup that's understandable but
"don't be a wolf in sheep clothing"
Make sure you do however dress appropriately for the restaurant, I wouldn't want you showing up in flats and a hat to Mr. Chow, not that you couldn't but take the opportunity to go to a lovely fancy restaurant and wear your fabulous dress u wouldn't necessarily wear to the club.
As you prepare for your date, and once you've decided on a time and a place jump online and look over the menu before you head out. This little trick helps A LOT! Not only can you make sure you're pronouncing your order correctly but it cuts down on the awkward silence while you're both trying to look at the menu, also if the date is going well from the beginning neither of u want to spend 25mins of not really looking at the menu because you both are still in conversation and neither of u can focus on the dishes, you know how that is, the waitress will come by 3 or 4times to ask if you're ready and you'll both say "oh geeze I wasn't even looking" this trick has helped me the most at sushi restaurants, coming from Pittsburgh we don't have many, I don't think we really have any to be honest so I would always get awkward not knowing what I was ordering, this will also get u familiar with the different dishes bc if u plan on staying/living or visiting LA for any length of time you'll want to be on point when it comes to your sushi game.
Now, if he asks you to pick the restaurant or if he asks u for a suggestion here are some awesome places, I've based them on where you may have met him and grouped accordingly, I also added in addresses, attire suggestions and my favorite dishes at each place!
Enjoy!!
So you're going on a date with a total hipster u met at a dark dive bar downtown, or at a Hollywood bar on Cahuenga Blvd he asks you to dinner and knowing he likes it low key, judging on where you met him you can suggest these places.
Here are some amazing 1st date places for dinner with your hipster in Hollywood.
Birds
5925 Franklin Avenue
Los Angeles, CA 90068
(323) 465-0175
Vibe: laid back bar/restaurant a place u can order a beer but still feel like a lady.
Attire: this is when u throw on those tight Frankie B skinny legs or thick black leggings, a pair of ankle boots a beanie or something cute in your hair and some funky layered jewelry
Check out http://www.shopmisskara.com/ for some awesome layering pieces.
If its warm out throw on a skirt or a cute pair of high waisted jean shorts with an open toe wedge and a plain tank along with some jewelry
My fav dish: 1/2 chicken marinated rotisserie chicken with 2 sides and choice or dipping sauce, it also come with pita bread and I always order a beer with it.
Toi Thai
505 1/2 W Sunset Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90046-3407
(323) 874-8062
One of my ALL time favorite places I LA
Attire- total rocker, this is when u break out the vintage tee the jean shorts, ripped jeans the ripped tights or knee highs I showed u how to wear in my post "Knee hi's" you can definitely wear those flat rocker boots you're afraid to wear to the club. Step out in a funky hair style and a dark lipstick, just ROCK out!
Vibe:The food is just as good as the vibe, they play amazing classic rock music just a touch too loud and u usually don't have to wait, if there is a little wait you can walk next door to the a joining art gallery that's filled with really cool paintings of your favorite rock stars to spark a convo and feel out what kind of music he's into and what kind of person he is by which paintings he's drawn to. Music is the best way to break the ice this restaurant is low key with dime lights and paintings and posters all over the walls, I LOVE LOVE LOVE
Side note: Although it looks like a good idea when u come in and see the table were u can sit on the floor and eat, I don't suggest picking this because your feet will fall asleep from sitting on them and it could be awkward positioning depending on that you're wearing, def not good seating if you're in a dress or skirt
My fav dish: the lemon chicken dish with a side of fried rice, the curry is to die for as well. Order some sake and a Sapporo and take some sake bombs, this is the perfect place to laugh, have fun and sing along to the background music.
Bossa Nova
7181 Sunset Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90046
(323) 436-7999
Vibe: super super casual, a brazilian resteraunt that has EVERYTHING from pizza to sandwhiches to pastas, indoor and outdoor seating.
Attire: Definitly a jeans and sweater or shorts and tshirt kind of place. Don't get too dolled up dress as if you were going to the movies or the mall but add an extra flair due to the fact it is a dinner.
My fav dish: the bread they give u is sooo yummy and the chucho chicken club sandwich or the chuchos salad are both great, the chicken alfredo pasta is delish and order a glass of white wine, I like the St. Michelle.
Barney's Beanery
8447 Santa Monica Boulevard,
West Hollywood
This place is cool because it has some history as well, it was the final destination for westbound travelers on route 66.
Vibe: This is a total bar vibe, pool tables and beer with bar food
Attire: You can wear pretty much anything I had mentioned in the previous places, I would suggest wearing flats though because it is more of a bar environment than a restaurant.
Fav dish: I'm totally obsessed with french fries and they have THE best here so I order any sort of sandwich with fries as my side and a Jack Daniels and coke.
Ok so you meet a guy at a posh club, he is dressed well, pretty stylish but not a hipster, he wants to grab sushi somewhere nice in Hollywood I suggest these place and I also suggest making a reservation.
Katsuya
6300 Hollywood Boulevard
Los Angeles
Koi
730 N La Cienega Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90069
(310) 659-9449
Katana
8439 West Sunset Boulevard
West Hollywood, CA 90069
(323) 650-8585
Nobu
903 North La Cienega Boulevard
West Hollywood, CA 90069-4709
(310) 657-5711
Now these are the places you break out the nice dresses and your expensive shoes, they are all the empitimy of "Hollywood" I promise on any given evening you will run into someone famous, going to these restaurants is your time to show off and shine. I suggest a classy little black dress with your added flair of style, a simple hair do and minimal make-up, carry a small clutch bag and bring out your best shoe.
Look over the menu before hand, make sure you know what each dish is, the good thing is if this guy is taking you to one of these places he usually does the ordering and you'll share. If not lucky for you, youll be prepared.
If hes looking for a nice steak house, here are my suggetions, same attire applies:
Stk
Boa
Cut
Mastros
Madeao
Fancy asian spots
Mr chow
Benihana
Gyro kaku
My personal favorite place to eat in all of LA is... drum roll please...
Dantana's!
9071 Santa Monica Boulevard
West Hollywood, CA 90069
(310) 275-9444
its the cutest homiest little gem in my opinion in Los Angeles I absolutly adore this spot and the staff. You almost get the feeling you having dinner at your cool Italian grandparents house and the food is to DIE for I cant even pick one thing on the menu because its all amazing, but theyre known for thier chicken parm. I give this place 5stars!
and finally a few of my favorite spots for lunch!
Primo
Ill tramazino
La scala
The farm
Fred siegal cafe
Tomato pie
Lalas
Sorry I got a little lazy at the end here and didnt add in addys and phone numbers but just throw them in your google search and you'll be able to find them. Happy dating and happy eating :)
Friday, December 17, 2010
**CAUTION** Male Groupie
So I got this email today to WARN us all about the many creeps lurking LA and praying on the "newbies" beware, male groupies are worse than female groupies. The funny thing is I know this person pretty well and I like him a lot but when you said about the "cold as Christmas" in his house it rang a bell. I don't know much about this guys personal life but I do know he's out ALL the time and no one has every really figured out what he does. Its like a myth, I've heard plenty of stories but no one knows who the REAL JAY is.
*DEAR DUNNIE*
Ok, so this is a guy everyone knows or has heard of in the party scene. Yet no one knows what the hell he does. I've heard several different rumors regarding his occupation, but based on what I know and seen this nigga is not doing SHIT! I been dealing with this guy since I was 19 years old and still to this day dont get his hype. So maybe I am the foolish one. Foolish but not stupid. I am a smart female when it comes to dudes, I know how to play my role and to keep my heart's best interests. From day one I knew this dude was a joke. But I figured hey why not! He had all the connects to the clubs, was always VIP and always took care of me. But he swears he was gaming me to this day. I should've ran ran ran when I went to his house for the 1st time for our lil "rendezvous." This nigga lived in a lil bitty shack/back house! It was cold as Christmas, he was sleeping in a BUNK BED!!! We did our do and to my surprise, it was NOT ALL THAT! TRUST! LMAO. The sad thing is let me tell you dude has chicks! And bad chicks at that, from video hoes to popular actresses/r&b singers. I don't know how he does it!
It took a minute for me to figure it out but I think I finally got his appeal but I finally got it he is a bitches step stool to the dudes with the "real money." I like to call him a male groupie or the hype man. He's always at different athletes, actors, entertainers tables, he holds their bottles and flosses their chains, cars, and everything else as if it's his when it's not. I dont know much about him now but throughout the 4 years I was fooling around with him he never had a car! I rather enjoyed playing with this dude. He constantly hit me up: bbm/txt/email/phone calls. I would only have sex with him when I wanted to. And that was always last resort penis.....he never lasted more than 5 mins not even with oral sex smh.
Basically in a nutshell: he loves what you call "newbies" he loves young girls he has to be damn near over 30 now. He swears he wants to commit but if he was he would keep his ass out the club. He talks to hella girls all in which hang out with eachother and thinks he slick about it and he really isnt. he's just a bum ass hollyHOOD dude. anytime we did anything it was because i was taking a "L" for my girls LOL..
Niggas have EGOS and they hate to have them bruised! So if your the 1st one to act like you dont give a fuck then they will be shocked! Men are such simple creatures, and we as women are def the complicated ones and us over thinking ish is what makes us THINK men are these big ASS HOLES we made them out to be. But really it's easy play the role....dont give a fuck about a dude til he shows (not says) how he feels. I think thats why i really like your blog. I learned my lesson long ago, men are dogs! Until i see how a dude interacts with his mama and family all that other shit's for the birds
Dont get me wrong i like Jay as a person i really do he's coo as fuck but i see right through him, he's predictable, insecure, and still trying to find himself.
I have so much to say about situations regarding men and dumb ass females that have made women have to act a certain way to keep a man because for every f'd up men out there it was a woman that made him that way, whether it was an ex, mama, grandma, or female in their life, thats just my opinion. =)
EXAMPLE: Single mother raising a young boy, brings men over that shes dating, always someone new, that little boy grows up thinking thats how women should be treated, inevitably he will treat other women in his life the same way. Thats his mom's fault! LOL let me stop!
Thanks for listening
-S
I love this, and I love that you played him while he thought he was playing you. I think you are TOTALLY right when you speak about how men act how the women in their life treated them, thats a great piece of advice.
Girls, just be careful out there if you feel in your gut somethings not right I can promise you there is something thats not right. Go with your gut instinct and if you're spending a lot of your time with this guy do whatever investigations you see fit. I've learned that its hard to take a guy seriously thats out every night in the club standing on top of tables when he doesn't even have a car, come on ladies OPEN your eyes and use your head. Take the advice of your friends and use what you see as your guide on how to treat your blooming relationship.
Shame Shame Shame
Good afternoon my wonderful blog readers!! I just want to thank you all for the e-mails and the wonderful feedback! Keep it coming I love hearing what you all have to say!
On this particular gloomy LA Friday I'd like to share with you something we ALL have experienced but rarley want to talk about.
Last night I had an AMAZING evening with my friends, we all stepped out and went to the Diddy listening party for his " Last train to Paris" album, which I love and you all should download on itunes, and then hit the club for some drinks and dancing.
So here's a little back story of what I'm about to tell you
A friend of mine had recently set me up through "bbm love connections" with a cute young rapper from London, "Chuck". Now Chuck and I had never met in person but had a fake love affair from across the ocean and through our blackberry's. Chuck finally made his way to LA and was at the same place I attended last evening. Lucky for me the mutual friend whom set us up was there as well because I only knew what he looked like from the blurry pictures he sent me through his bbm.
I think we both had one too many glasses of champagne but we were both feeling each other he was cute, sweet well dressed and seemed to be having a great time, which is super attractive when someone is genuinely enjoying themselves.
Long story short he asks me to go with him to grab some food after the club, I agree. I woke up this morning in a hotel bed in my clothes and fake eyelashes from the night before.
Shame shame shame, this is how I looked leaving this morning, hair a mess, eyelashes falling off and heels on, not the best look. So I thought to myself, how can we fix this, cause I know all of you have been through it.
So here are some ideas.
Whats worked for me in the past is carrying a make up wipe in my bag, you can get them at any drug store, the ones that come dry that you have to wet, I like theses ones
Just throw one in a small plastic sandwich bag and put it in your purse or clutch, you can wipe off that ugly mascara that's made its way down your face and the bright red lipstick that had stained your lips.
In your morning after survival pack you should have a
-small brush
-a few bobby pins
-your makeup wipes an
-extra phone battery or charger
-hair ties
Now you can't do much about the outfit unfortunately and even if he does offer you a t-shirt and some shorts, the shoes are always dead give away.
My worst walk of shame ever was leaving the Four Season's hotel the morning after my 22nd birthday in THIS dress after spending an intimate evening with Nickelback front man Chad Kroeger .
Yes that HIDEOUS dress with those ridiculous shoes and that HILARIOUS man. Not my proudest moment.
Cause that's why they call it a "Walk of Shame"
So anyways! Have fun, be safe and always stay beautiful!
On this particular gloomy LA Friday I'd like to share with you something we ALL have experienced but rarley want to talk about.
Last night I had an AMAZING evening with my friends, we all stepped out and went to the Diddy listening party for his " Last train to Paris" album, which I love and you all should download on itunes, and then hit the club for some drinks and dancing.
So here's a little back story of what I'm about to tell you
A friend of mine had recently set me up through "bbm love connections" with a cute young rapper from London, "Chuck". Now Chuck and I had never met in person but had a fake love affair from across the ocean and through our blackberry's. Chuck finally made his way to LA and was at the same place I attended last evening. Lucky for me the mutual friend whom set us up was there as well because I only knew what he looked like from the blurry pictures he sent me through his bbm.
I think we both had one too many glasses of champagne but we were both feeling each other he was cute, sweet well dressed and seemed to be having a great time, which is super attractive when someone is genuinely enjoying themselves.
Long story short he asks me to go with him to grab some food after the club, I agree. I woke up this morning in a hotel bed in my clothes and fake eyelashes from the night before.
Shame shame shame, this is how I looked leaving this morning, hair a mess, eyelashes falling off and heels on, not the best look. So I thought to myself, how can we fix this, cause I know all of you have been through it.
So here are some ideas.
Whats worked for me in the past is carrying a make up wipe in my bag, you can get them at any drug store, the ones that come dry that you have to wet, I like theses ones
In your morning after survival pack you should have a
-small brush
-a few bobby pins
-your makeup wipes an
-extra phone battery or charger
-hair ties
Now you can't do much about the outfit unfortunately and even if he does offer you a t-shirt and some shorts, the shoes are always dead give away.
My worst walk of shame ever was leaving the Four Season's hotel the morning after my 22nd birthday in THIS dress after spending an intimate evening with Nickelback front man Chad Kroeger .
Yes that HIDEOUS dress with those ridiculous shoes and that HILARIOUS man. Not my proudest moment.
Cause that's why they call it a "Walk of Shame"
So anyways! Have fun, be safe and always stay beautiful!
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Lying cheating son of a gun!!!!
I'm going to share with all of you my last relationship because Ive got LOTS of emails asking the same questions I was asking myself last month and like I said, I'm much better at giving advice than taking my own.
Here's the scenario: I met this boy, and yes I will call him a boy because he is NOT a man, at a pool party at my best guy friends house, he came with a mutual friend of my ex's.
1st mistake: Like I stressed before, its never the best idea to date friends
I didn't know him at all and at the time I wasn't fully aware of how he fit into the circle of guys I had previously known from my ex and my roommate Shanti. He started talking to my friend Audra, well hitting on her actually, I heard him ask Audra for her number and she replied " I have a boyfriend" he then replied with "so"
2nd mistake: He doesn't respect relationships nor does he care about commitment
We continued to drink and moved the party to the apt I share with Shanti, we continued to drink and this boy and I started to have conversations. As the night died down and everyone was getting sleepy he asked me if I wanted to go back to his place with him. I agreed only because my other friend was going as well, I ended up spending the night but we DID NOT sleep together, I thought I saw some potential in this guy. The next morning he dropped me back off at home and promised to see me in a few hours so we could go to the LA fair, somehow along the line we didn't exchange numbers and he "didn't get my number" until hours later
3rd mistake: If he actually liked me I would have been on his mind and he would have FOUND my number to confirm or cancel plans, he knows all of our mutual friends and with twitter, bbm and a million other ways it would have taken him one phone call or one text to have my phone number.
I agreed to meet up with him later at his house to watch a movie, for the 1st few weeks he was on his best behavior, the only thing that struck me as weird was we didn't speak much during the day, he would go on about his day as would I and it would be 8,9,10 at night before Id get a text or return call RED FLAG! he already wasn't making me feel like I was an important part of his daily activities aka his life. I didn't get too upset about it though I just thought maybe we'll take this all slow.
WRONG - Let me tell you, when you start a relationship with someone you have to set your expectations up front or he wont know what you expect out of him and before you know it he will be walking all over you.
In the weeks to come things just started getting worse and worse, I went to a social event were he was performing, I only went to support him and brought all my friends whom I was so excited to have him meet, he completely ignored me and didn't even let me know when he got inside the venue, I had to actually walk by the table he was sitting at to find out he was there.
If you come out to support your man you and your friends should be his number one priority next to his performance, whatever it may be, basketball, football, singing. I'm not saying he should follow you around like a puppy but he should show he appreciates your support and the fact that your friends are there to show support to someone they don't know shows that they love the girl he's interested in and he should acknowledge that. I mean "whats a star when your most important fan is missing"
Then he started disappearing at night, not answering the phone after he would go out for a "boys night". We would make plans and he would simply not show or not answer the phone, he would call the next day to apologize with stories as of where he was, his phone died about 3 times, one time he fell asleep at a friends hotel room, once he passed out drunk and didn't hear the phone, this boy thought of EVERY excuse, and I believed him.
If a guy is into you, he cant wait for you to come over at night and crawl into bed with him, no matter what, hes looking at his phone, hes texting you throughout the night and he is at least if he doesn't want you with him that night saying good night, see my biggest thing was, isn't it much easier to pick up the phone, say your tired and go about whatever you're doing? Nope they would rather have you going insane wondering where they are, and most of the time I was most worried about his safety
I was turning into the girl I didn't want to be I was sitting at home alone to "show him I was "well behaved and wifey material"
WHAT is wifey material, because looking around this city, wifey is the dumb broad sitting at home holding everything down while her man is out fucking all the ratchet hoes he can. Ladies DO as you please if you have your shit together and you want to be out every night GO OUT as long as youre paying your bills and aren't making a complete ass of yourself HAVE fun, do not sit around to "show him" if he likes you he will like you for you, you may have to compromise but NEVER put your life on hold for a man or anyone for that matter, trust me life is WAY to short.
I was stalking his twitter, his friends twitter and being the girl I NEVER was. I don't stalk, they stalk with me. The sad thing was that behind closed doors he constantly assured me I was his girl and that "he loved me" and " no matter what he wasn't going anywhere" FUCK that he might not be going anywhere but I sure as hell was.
I think what finally made things click was one day I had come to his house after we had 2 days apart because he again wasn't answering the phone, I had planned out a night for us, see he's from Chicago and there is a special day there called, "Sweetest day" it's a Valentines day for men. I made cupcakes, got him a build a bear, got waxed had my hair done and did my makeup he assured me he would call me after the club and I would meet him at his house, I never got a call, in fact, I didn't get a call for 2days when he finally did call I went running like a stupid asshole, a few " I'm so sorry babies" and " I miss yous" and I was off and running to his side.
Like I told you, I'm a VERY observant person, when I went into his room that night I immediately went into the bathroom and noticed my toothbrush was put away, my girly shampoos and razors where under the sink along with my flat iron, now this boy doesn't clean and it finally clicked, he had put away all of my belongings because he had someone else over, it didn't hurt so much that he had another girl over it hurt more that he cared whether or not the girl saw my belongings, if she was random who gives a shit if you "have a girlfriend" that was the little piece of pure evidence that was right in front of my eyes to make my heart change.
I still continued to see him, and speak every once in a while but it just wasn't the same. I had begun to let go, after I went on a trip to Miami with some friends I really started to be ok with it. When I got back a close friend of mine informed me that he had been sleeping with a mutual friend of hers, that broke my heart, even though I was "over it" it sucked that he had actually moved on first, not that they were a couple but that he was ok with sleeping with someone I would know about.
Even after that piece of information I still continued to pick up his calls and see him out. We only slept together once after I heard about the "new girl" and I think I just needed that as closure, I finally ended it when his punk ass slipped up and invited both me and the other girl over at the same night, I'm not really sure how this dumb ass played it all out but long story short, as I was pulling up to his apt, he had invited me lets clear that up I wasn't stalking, and as I was getting out of the car she was walking up to the gate as well, a part of me wanted to confront him and yell and scream and be dramatic, but I decided to handle myself like a lady and act like it didn't bother me, I got into the car and drove away I then sent him a text so that he knew I had seen her and really just let go of him. He of course tried to lie saying she showed up on her own blah blah blah. Yea whatever save it for the bird. LIAR LIAR LIAR
He really didn't leave my heart until recently when I met an amazing person who likes me for who I am, he picks up my calls and keeps his promises, he says what he means and means what he says and it made me realize I'm worth so much more.
This lying ass loser will probably end up all alone, I think he's so unhappy with himself he feels the way to boost his ego is sleep with all these girls and have them want him when the truth of the matter is they will fall for a lie, he is a lie everything he does and says is a lie and I fell for it, I have a great quote for him if he reads this
"There is no stopping true love, unless you fall in love with a lie that's found out"
So common ladies blast that Deuces remix and CHUCK THEM UP with me
Move on to something better!
Here's the scenario: I met this boy, and yes I will call him a boy because he is NOT a man, at a pool party at my best guy friends house, he came with a mutual friend of my ex's.
1st mistake: Like I stressed before, its never the best idea to date friends
I didn't know him at all and at the time I wasn't fully aware of how he fit into the circle of guys I had previously known from my ex and my roommate Shanti. He started talking to my friend Audra, well hitting on her actually, I heard him ask Audra for her number and she replied " I have a boyfriend" he then replied with "so"
2nd mistake: He doesn't respect relationships nor does he care about commitment
We continued to drink and moved the party to the apt I share with Shanti, we continued to drink and this boy and I started to have conversations. As the night died down and everyone was getting sleepy he asked me if I wanted to go back to his place with him. I agreed only because my other friend was going as well, I ended up spending the night but we DID NOT sleep together, I thought I saw some potential in this guy. The next morning he dropped me back off at home and promised to see me in a few hours so we could go to the LA fair, somehow along the line we didn't exchange numbers and he "didn't get my number" until hours later
3rd mistake: If he actually liked me I would have been on his mind and he would have FOUND my number to confirm or cancel plans, he knows all of our mutual friends and with twitter, bbm and a million other ways it would have taken him one phone call or one text to have my phone number.
I agreed to meet up with him later at his house to watch a movie, for the 1st few weeks he was on his best behavior, the only thing that struck me as weird was we didn't speak much during the day, he would go on about his day as would I and it would be 8,9,10 at night before Id get a text or return call RED FLAG! he already wasn't making me feel like I was an important part of his daily activities aka his life. I didn't get too upset about it though I just thought maybe we'll take this all slow.
WRONG - Let me tell you, when you start a relationship with someone you have to set your expectations up front or he wont know what you expect out of him and before you know it he will be walking all over you.
In the weeks to come things just started getting worse and worse, I went to a social event were he was performing, I only went to support him and brought all my friends whom I was so excited to have him meet, he completely ignored me and didn't even let me know when he got inside the venue, I had to actually walk by the table he was sitting at to find out he was there.
If you come out to support your man you and your friends should be his number one priority next to his performance, whatever it may be, basketball, football, singing. I'm not saying he should follow you around like a puppy but he should show he appreciates your support and the fact that your friends are there to show support to someone they don't know shows that they love the girl he's interested in and he should acknowledge that. I mean "whats a star when your most important fan is missing"
Then he started disappearing at night, not answering the phone after he would go out for a "boys night". We would make plans and he would simply not show or not answer the phone, he would call the next day to apologize with stories as of where he was, his phone died about 3 times, one time he fell asleep at a friends hotel room, once he passed out drunk and didn't hear the phone, this boy thought of EVERY excuse, and I believed him.
If a guy is into you, he cant wait for you to come over at night and crawl into bed with him, no matter what, hes looking at his phone, hes texting you throughout the night and he is at least if he doesn't want you with him that night saying good night, see my biggest thing was, isn't it much easier to pick up the phone, say your tired and go about whatever you're doing? Nope they would rather have you going insane wondering where they are, and most of the time I was most worried about his safety
I was turning into the girl I didn't want to be I was sitting at home alone to "show him I was "well behaved and wifey material"
WHAT is wifey material, because looking around this city, wifey is the dumb broad sitting at home holding everything down while her man is out fucking all the ratchet hoes he can. Ladies DO as you please if you have your shit together and you want to be out every night GO OUT as long as youre paying your bills and aren't making a complete ass of yourself HAVE fun, do not sit around to "show him" if he likes you he will like you for you, you may have to compromise but NEVER put your life on hold for a man or anyone for that matter, trust me life is WAY to short.
I was stalking his twitter, his friends twitter and being the girl I NEVER was. I don't stalk, they stalk with me. The sad thing was that behind closed doors he constantly assured me I was his girl and that "he loved me" and " no matter what he wasn't going anywhere" FUCK that he might not be going anywhere but I sure as hell was.
I think what finally made things click was one day I had come to his house after we had 2 days apart because he again wasn't answering the phone, I had planned out a night for us, see he's from Chicago and there is a special day there called, "Sweetest day" it's a Valentines day for men. I made cupcakes, got him a build a bear, got waxed had my hair done and did my makeup he assured me he would call me after the club and I would meet him at his house, I never got a call, in fact, I didn't get a call for 2days when he finally did call I went running like a stupid asshole, a few " I'm so sorry babies" and " I miss yous" and I was off and running to his side.
Like I told you, I'm a VERY observant person, when I went into his room that night I immediately went into the bathroom and noticed my toothbrush was put away, my girly shampoos and razors where under the sink along with my flat iron, now this boy doesn't clean and it finally clicked, he had put away all of my belongings because he had someone else over, it didn't hurt so much that he had another girl over it hurt more that he cared whether or not the girl saw my belongings, if she was random who gives a shit if you "have a girlfriend" that was the little piece of pure evidence that was right in front of my eyes to make my heart change.
I still continued to see him, and speak every once in a while but it just wasn't the same. I had begun to let go, after I went on a trip to Miami with some friends I really started to be ok with it. When I got back a close friend of mine informed me that he had been sleeping with a mutual friend of hers, that broke my heart, even though I was "over it" it sucked that he had actually moved on first, not that they were a couple but that he was ok with sleeping with someone I would know about.
Even after that piece of information I still continued to pick up his calls and see him out. We only slept together once after I heard about the "new girl" and I think I just needed that as closure, I finally ended it when his punk ass slipped up and invited both me and the other girl over at the same night, I'm not really sure how this dumb ass played it all out but long story short, as I was pulling up to his apt, he had invited me lets clear that up I wasn't stalking, and as I was getting out of the car she was walking up to the gate as well, a part of me wanted to confront him and yell and scream and be dramatic, but I decided to handle myself like a lady and act like it didn't bother me, I got into the car and drove away I then sent him a text so that he knew I had seen her and really just let go of him. He of course tried to lie saying she showed up on her own blah blah blah. Yea whatever save it for the bird. LIAR LIAR LIAR
He really didn't leave my heart until recently when I met an amazing person who likes me for who I am, he picks up my calls and keeps his promises, he says what he means and means what he says and it made me realize I'm worth so much more.
This lying ass loser will probably end up all alone, I think he's so unhappy with himself he feels the way to boost his ego is sleep with all these girls and have them want him when the truth of the matter is they will fall for a lie, he is a lie everything he does and says is a lie and I fell for it, I have a great quote for him if he reads this
"There is no stopping true love, unless you fall in love with a lie that's found out"
So common ladies blast that Deuces remix and CHUCK THEM UP with me
Move on to something better!
KNEE HI's
Ok, So I def don't want my blog to be a fashion blog AT ALL Im not here to show you about Louboutins and Chanel dresses that 85% of us can't afford. In all honesty I'd rather see someone in a vintage dress from the thrift store a leather jacket and some ankle boots, that shows REAL style.
So I thought for my first post today I'd like to share with you MY FAVORITE stores in LA to shop.
It might sound cliche but I have always adored URBAN OUTFITTERS, I can always find some sort of funky hat or off the wall jewelry, inexpensive ankle boots or a great thick knit beanie
This outfit is from Urban Outfitters the dress was only $45 the belts was $24 everyone has a leather jacket and I paired it with some knee highs and my FAVORITE shoe, the Sam Edelman ankle boot.
This can also be worn as a day dress, This day I paired it with some thick rimmed sunnies(not shown), my Sam Edelman knee high cut out boot, removed the belt and added a funky hair style, my necklace is actually a headband I bought at CVS, don't judge me.
MY all time favorite place to shop in LA is a little store on Melrose called SLOW. They have the perfect mix of PURE vintage clothing mixed with pieces exclusive to the store, if you buy anything in there you will be sure no one else will have it. They usually make only one or 2 of the same pieces an everything else is straight vintage! Go check it out when you have a chance, the price point is pretty reasonable usually between $48-$150
Slow Clothing
Even though this store Isn't really in the same category as our vintage shops I can't RESIST Kitson, Its a weakness, I love the jewelry and they carry everything Sam Edelman who right now is one of my top 5 favorite designers of 2011 so check Kitson out and also if you're looking for something REALLY nice and you're wiling to spend a pretty penny you can hit INTERMIX.
Kitson
115 South Robertson Boulevard
Los Angeles, CA 90048
(310) 859-2652
Intermix
110 Robertson Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90048
(310) 860-0113
Lucky for you LF, Kitson and Intermix are all on the same street, oh and while you're walking down Robertson you MUST stop for a crab cake at the Ivy Restaurant, you'll never live life the same.
The IVY
113 N Robertson Blvd, Los Angeles, California(310) 274-8303
So if you've seen me out lately you've probably noticed my sick new obsession with knee high stockings! I am absolutely in LOVE with how they look with everything, I wear them with skirts, shorts, dresses, everything I think it just adds so much to an outfit. I think EVERYONE should go out and buy a pair, I got mine at Kmart 4 pairs for $12 and if you go to the Kmart on 3rd street theres a Little Ceasers inside!!! (side note) but yes, GO GET knee highs! But be careful of how you wear them and make sure to only get black for going out, but I also have a really cute pair of white ones that are wool, I wear them with my moccasins for daytime DO NOT WEAR WHITE knee highs out to a club or without a boot over it. Here are some outfits I put together and added my KNEE HIGHS for a little extra
I'm also obsessed with ripped tights! Let me tell you, I was with all of my guy friends at a concert they had put on and last minute we decided to stay the night I had NOTHING with me to wear out to the club and the only thing open was Ralph's, I jumped into survival mode and bought a pair of black stocking that I ripped and put holes in. I then threw on a pair of jean shorts a flannel I had tied around my waist all day, unbuttoned the flannel flirty and low to add some cleavage and threw on my yes, Sam Edelman, ankle boots. I looked totally rock and roll and the outfit cost 3dollars the rest I had with me, but the tights really pulled it all together and made it look funky and original. Heres a pick of me in my ripped creations!
So set out and find you re own style! Buying the most expensive thing in the store or copying what celebs have doesn't make you stylish, it makes you basic and a second rate version of someone else. So happy shopping and send me some of the outfits you guys put together! Id love to post your findings and creations! DunnieJ@gmail.com
So I thought for my first post today I'd like to share with you MY FAVORITE stores in LA to shop.
It might sound cliche but I have always adored URBAN OUTFITTERS, I can always find some sort of funky hat or off the wall jewelry, inexpensive ankle boots or a great thick knit beanie
This is my FAV ankle boot, by Sam Edelman I wear these with EVERYTHING and the detailing is removable. 389.00 online www.SamEdelman.com this shoe is worth every penny.
And I think this boot is just a MUST have for an edgy rocker chick, I pair these with skirts, jean shorts, dresses, long dresses EVERYTHING day time, you could pull them off at night with a pair of tiny jean shorts a vintage t-shirt some ripped tights and of course a leather jacket, boots also by Sam Edelman
This can also be worn as a day dress, This day I paired it with some thick rimmed sunnies(not shown), my Sam Edelman knee high cut out boot, removed the belt and added a funky hair style, my necklace is actually a headband I bought at CVS, don't judge me.
MY all time favorite place to shop in LA is a little store on Melrose called SLOW. They have the perfect mix of PURE vintage clothing mixed with pieces exclusive to the store, if you buy anything in there you will be sure no one else will have it. They usually make only one or 2 of the same pieces an everything else is straight vintage! Go check it out when you have a chance, the price point is pretty reasonable usually between $48-$150
Slow Clothing
(323) 655-3725
7474 Melrose Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90046
Los Angeles, CA 90046
Call me crazy but I think this outfit is ON point, I love everything about it, I think tights and flats are SO sexy, Im totally into the nerd glasses phase! I would probably shorten the scarf a bit and the fur jacket is a bit much for me, I prefer leather. This is the perfect example of something you could put together from a thrift or consignment store, heres a list of my favorites.
Wasteland
(323) 653-3028
7428 Melrose Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90046
(323) 653-3028
7428 Melrose Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90046
American Vintage
7575 Melrose Ave.
Los Angeles, CA 90046
323-944-0640
7575 Melrose Ave.
Los Angeles, CA 90046
323-944-0640
LF106 South Robertson Boulevard
Los Angeles, CA 90048-3208
(310) 271-2727
Even though this store Isn't really in the same category as our vintage shops I can't RESIST Kitson, Its a weakness, I love the jewelry and they carry everything Sam Edelman who right now is one of my top 5 favorite designers of 2011 so check Kitson out and also if you're looking for something REALLY nice and you're wiling to spend a pretty penny you can hit INTERMIX.
Kitson
115 South Robertson Boulevard
Los Angeles, CA 90048
(310) 859-2652
Intermix
110 Robertson Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90048
(310) 860-0113
Lucky for you LF, Kitson and Intermix are all on the same street, oh and while you're walking down Robertson you MUST stop for a crab cake at the Ivy Restaurant, you'll never live life the same.
The IVY
113 N Robertson Blvd, Los Angeles, California
So if you've seen me out lately you've probably noticed my sick new obsession with knee high stockings! I am absolutely in LOVE with how they look with everything, I wear them with skirts, shorts, dresses, everything I think it just adds so much to an outfit. I think EVERYONE should go out and buy a pair, I got mine at Kmart 4 pairs for $12 and if you go to the Kmart on 3rd street theres a Little Ceasers inside!!! (side note) but yes, GO GET knee highs! But be careful of how you wear them and make sure to only get black for going out, but I also have a really cute pair of white ones that are wool, I wear them with my moccasins for daytime DO NOT WEAR WHITE knee highs out to a club or without a boot over it. Here are some outfits I put together and added my KNEE HIGHS for a little extra
I'm also obsessed with ripped tights! Let me tell you, I was with all of my guy friends at a concert they had put on and last minute we decided to stay the night I had NOTHING with me to wear out to the club and the only thing open was Ralph's, I jumped into survival mode and bought a pair of black stocking that I ripped and put holes in. I then threw on a pair of jean shorts a flannel I had tied around my waist all day, unbuttoned the flannel flirty and low to add some cleavage and threw on my yes, Sam Edelman, ankle boots. I looked totally rock and roll and the outfit cost 3dollars the rest I had with me, but the tights really pulled it all together and made it look funky and original. Heres a pick of me in my ripped creations!
So set out and find you re own style! Buying the most expensive thing in the store or copying what celebs have doesn't make you stylish, it makes you basic and a second rate version of someone else. So happy shopping and send me some of the outfits you guys put together! Id love to post your findings and creations! DunnieJ@gmail.com
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